The Worst Movies of 2016

Warcraft

While I love making lists of the best movies of any given year, it’s always painful to counter that with a list of the worst movies. By the time the end of the year comes around, I’ve forgotten about a lot of movies that I saw earlier in the year, so it’s sad to remind myself.

There are some that will forever be burned into my memory because of how awful they were. So, wallow in the muck with me as we go over the worst films 2016 had to offer.

The worst movie of 2016 was Duncan Jones’ Warcraft. Jones has been an exciting new director for a while with the wonderful Moon and the entertaining action flick Source Code but Warcraft was a soulless spectacle without one redeeming quality. I remain excited for what Jones does next and hope Warcraft was a fluke.

In alphabetical order, here are 10 (well, 11) more movies that were the worst of the year, with brief thoughts.

Blair Witch: An ungodly bore of a film and complete disappointment. From the team that brought us You’re Next and the effortlessly cool The Guest, Blair Witch should have had a lot more verve.

Collateral Beauty: I could go on for days about the absurdity of Will Smith’s latest. This movie is nothing the trailer would suggest and rarely has a movie actively hated its audience so much.

Gods of Egypt: The first 20 minutes or so seem to play like a new trashy guilty pleasure. Quickly, any sense of fun evaporates.

Hardcore Henry: This movie was nauseating and stupid – an absolute headache from start-to-finish.

 Nine Lives: The worst movie you have to see. That’s all I’ll say about that.

Risen: Jesus’ body is lost and we are forced to go on the world’s most boring scavenger hunt to find it.

Rules Don’t Apply: There are probably worse movies that could populate a spot on this list but Warren Beatty’s passionless passion project is so incoherent, it’s extremely frustrating.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows: Why is Laura Linney in this?

The Zach Galifanakis Double Feature: There were no lamer of comedies than Keeping Up with the Joneses and Masterminds, both starring Galifanakis. These movies beg the question, why does Zach Galifanakis still get work?

 Zoolander 2: The first one wasn’t even good.

The list could go on, unfortunately, but why continue to torture ourselves with these cinematic embarrassments? Onward and upward…

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s